Saturday 23 April 2011

Lonely Is What I Feel :( :(

Sepi hati terjadi lagi 
Mungkin sampai mati aku sepi 
Biar senyum hadir di hariku 
namun ini hanya ada di bibir 
di bibir saja 

Aku ini yang bisa mengerti 
walaupun yang lain mau mengerti 
Namun berat beban hidupku 
biarkan saja 
Biar saja hanya ku yang tahu 

Sejarah cinta dan hidupku 
penuh duri dan banyak ranjau 
Butuh kesabaran yang penuh 
untuk tetap ku berdiri 

ada saatnya ku bicara
bila hatiku telah bulat
Sepanjang ku bisa atasi semua
aku tetap diam

sejarah cinta dan hidupku
penuh duri dan banyak ranjau
butuh kesabaran yang penuh
untuk tetap ku berdiri

ada saatnya ku bicara
bila hatiku telah bulat
Sepanjang ku bisa atasi semua
aku tetap diam

Tryin To Forget Him Deeplyyy Although Its Hard :'( :'(

I miss him badly ,
i miss his odour .
We have too many similarities !!
like music, fathers name , and , everythings .
and also , sometimes i still remember our moments .
thats make make me really sad and very hard to forget you .
Its almost 3 weeks , he left me without feel sympathy , without any feelings , and , just go like that or chase out of my life just like that  .
THANKS MAN 4 WHAT U DID TO ME .
I HOPE I WONT AND NEVER SEEN HIS FACE AGAIN .
NEVER EVER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
when he do this to me , it seems like its all my fault . 
totally my fault what u did to me now .
and, like i did a big mistakes to you .
i totally feel regret to know you and met you .
How i can met you ?
I thought you were a different man or different guy that i ever met .
but, you are totally same that i know about guy .
i know , i shouldnt say that .
it sounds im too fasting too being in relationships with you , too harsh with you , and , im sorry i say like that to you .
and , since he chase out my life and go away from my life , seriously, i feel i no point to live in this fcukin world . and my life dont have any worth anymore .
My life is really miserable after what he did to me like this .
And , only about him i can sick and got a bad sick .
Aku pernah saket keranaa fuckin dude .
He ruins my life !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANKS !!!!!!
I WISH YOU CAN GET BETTER GIRL THAN ME .
I KNOW, IM TOO CRUEL FOR YOU AND IM NOT SUITS FOR YOU .
AND ALSO , I WISH YOU HAPPY EVERAFTER !!!!!!!!!! 





Monday 18 April 2011

Fucking Shit Bitch :)

Thanks to fucking shit bitch because delete me as your friends at facebook .
AHAHAHAHAHHA~ 
DO I CARE ?
malah, aku tak mati and aku tak kebulur pum tak jadi kawan kau  kat kolej and kat facebook doe  .
tpi aku just MENYESAL jee jady kawan koe .
and, terimaa kaseh cakap aku macam-macam or kutuk aku macam macam di depan kawan kawan aku dan kawan kau sertaa di khalayak orang ramai .
And for ur info, koe tuh yang tak matang and syok sendiri .
kataa orang syok sendiri pulak and bitch lah doeeee .
then, janji never tunaikan or tak pernah tepati .
yeyee jee janjii or yee yee jee cakap tuh  .
BODOHHHHHHHHHHHH~
BANGANGGGGGGGGGGG~ 
tak pernah aku jumpee mahluk cm koe .
dh lah tak adaaa teetttttttttttttttttt~ 
then, hampir tiap2 bulan, maen benda kejadah haram tuh .
BODOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~
mulaa lah aku bongkar life koe kang .
DAH LAH HIDUP PENUH GELUMANG DENGAN DOSA ,
koe tuh dah lah sukaa gunakan laki laki kat luar sanaa dengan mengikis duit merekaa .
then, dah lah gadis materialistik .
Nak nasehat orang , cermin dulu lah .
diri sendiri pum xbetul .
nak nasehatkan orang .
koe tuh cm lah bagus sngat .
koe engat kat luar sanaa , kawan-kawan sukaa koee kee ?
malah dorang meluat and bencii gilaa dengan attitude koe adaa lah .
FUCKKKKKK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU !
AND YOU ARE LIKE A CHEAP WOMAN STUPID !
Aku tak pernah susah hidup koe and tak masuk campur hidop koe,
koe jangan nak susah hidup aku boleh tak .
AKU TAK HALALKAN DUIT AKU KAT KOE DOE 
BIAR BILAA KOE MAMPUS NANTI AND DI DALAM KUBUR NANTI, KOE TAK TENANG DOE  .

Wink wink ;) :D :)


















He`s not a handsome guy ,
but , He is a really kind person that i`ve never met this before ,
and also He is the funniest person that i ever met ,
I very glad to know him ,
I really feel happy to be his friend .
and , im really proud to be his friend .
He always cheers me and make me happy when im not in mood or when im feeling sad .
He willing to hear my problem ,
He accept me whatever i am ,
And, what the important it is,
He like to advice me when im doing wrong and he always be my side .
and also , He never count on me .
I hope our friendship never ends and lasts .
and I also I hope we can be a good friend .
Im sorry if i have hurt you before this about my attitude ,
im sorry if i have raise my voice to you and also, im sorry if before this i can`t understand you .
im really really sorry .
hope you can forgive me .
And You`re the best best person and the best best friends that i have :)

Tuesday 12 April 2011

Overwhelming Sadness :'( :'(

After kejadian tuh , after class and after makan dengan kawan aku kat warung ibu .
aku langsung terus blek ke ostel dengan penuh selambaa . 
aku makan pum tadi cm xadaa seleraa doe , tppi aku gagah jugak habeskan .  
and dengan tak adaa mood and rasaa cm nak nangess jee weyhh .
sepatutnyee adaa class lepas itu .
tapi aku tak pegi .
MALAS !!!!!!!
and tak adaa mood nak study doe .
then, after arrived at my hostel .
aku terus langsung pergi kee bilik kawan aku di hostel itu .
aku pergi bilik merekaa sebab nak lepak - lepak , and , release kesedihan aku and stress aku .
tapi, after smpai di sanaa , dalam beberapaa minit dorangg bahan aku . 
tuh xpee lagy .
then, secaraa tak sengajaa aku lepaskan keluhan aku kat harlow about CAPITAL AB . 
aku ckp cm niey lah y blah blah and mcam2 lah about abrar .
then, bilaa aku luahkan apaa y aku rasaa time kejadian tuh and ariniey kat kawan aku, secaraa tak sengajaa aku menanges doe .
aku sedih gilaa lately nie especially dengan kejadian hari niey . 
seriously sedih gilaa doe .
aku menanges tanpaa berhenti - henti and sedu-sedu .
then, harlow pum ckp kat aku and marah marah aku !
then, suddenly aku teringat moments aku dengan dyee kat kolej .
sumpaa sweet and comel doe . then, aku menanges gila-gilaa lah weyh !
and niey time aku menulis pasal apaa y aku rasaa and about him kat blog niey sekarang niey pum,  aku dah menanges gilaa doe .
serious aku rasaa today aku sedih gilaa babii doe,
aku tak boleh nak senyum doe !
even kawan aku buad lawak and senyum untuk sekejap .
pum tak boleh . seriously tak boleh ! 

Cryingggggggggg And Broken Heart :'( :'(

Maseh aku engat aksi dan kejadian padaa tanggal 12 april 2011, dalam lingkungan pukul 10 pagi .  waktu tuh aku tengah ingin menuju ke kelas hr , then, aku masuk ke kelas hr ku sperti biasaa , time tuh lec tak masuk lagy, then, tibaa - tibaa harlow ( kawanku ) ajak aku teman kan dyee pegi beli makanan dekat koperasi college, then aku pum temankan dyee lah sebab aku dah tak pape nak buad and aku bosan gilaa time tuh  . aku pum follow lah . then , secaraa tak sengajaa dan kebetulan aku dan kawanku ( harlow ) ternampak CAPITAL AB  .  then, harlow pum tegur dyee dan CAPITAL AB pum tegur lah balek harlow , tpi time tuh aku tak tegur sbb aku macam terkejut and macam tak percayaa jee yang aku ternampak dyee hari niey selepas hampir satu bulan aku tak nampak dyee and dyee sperti menghilangkan diri dan tak nampak kelibat dyee langsung kat kolej , then, time tuh CAPITAL AB and kawan-kawan baru dyee tengah tggu class start . y tak boleh blahnyee class dyee sebelah class aku jee kot  . memang tak lah kan . then, aku and harlow pum pergi terus lah kat koperasi college . then, after harlow lepas bli makanan, aku and harlow pum balek lah class . then, after aku masuk class . aku duk jap . * haty aku cm tak percyaa jee, btulkaa tuh CAPITAL AB ? * then, aku pum kuar lah untuk tengok dyee kat kelas . then,aku pum tgk lah  memang dyee lah and sah lah laki tuh CAPITAL AB . then, aku sjja lah tengok CAPITAL AB melalui cermin tingkap . time tuh CAPITAL AB tengah layan movie dalam class with his friends ,  then dyee toleh kee belakang . pastuh aku pum cepat2 lah toleh kee tempat laen . aku buad cmtuh supayaa dyee tak perasan y aku sedang ushaa dyee . then CAPITAL AB pum keluar lah dengan bawaa lappy dyee ( y serupaa ngan aku ) sertaa kawan2 dyee pum keluar sekali lah dri class tuh .  then, time tuh aku berdiri hadapan kelas dyee , aku pum ushaa dyee lah kan . tpi dyee langsung tak ushaa aku time tuh . memang sedih doe time tuh aku rasaa, aku rasaa dyee perasan y time tuh aku adaa kat situ, tpi dyee buad2 tak nampak and tak perasan. then, time tuh dyee dan kawan-kawan dyee berdiri di hadapan aku . aku pum blah lah . aku pum masuk lah class aku balek , pastuh aku keluar lah balek dri class aku untuk ushaa dyee balek . then, aku pum terkejut lah y dyee pum ushaa aku balek, tpi pandangan dyee tuh, hanyaa tuhan sjja lah thu and memang sumpaa sedih gilaa doe time tuh . dyee pandang aku dengan penuh kebencian dan dendam doe -,-  serious time tuh aku rasaa sedih and nak nanges gilaa jee time tuh . hanyaa tuhan sajja y thu . harlow pum perasaan time tuh dan lihat jee aksi kitaorg berduaa . dyee langsung tak tegur aku ! dyee hanyaa ushaa jee .  :'(  :'(  :'(  aku tak pernah tengok CAPITAL AB pandang aku cmtuh . tak pernah doe . tak pernah !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! seriously aku rasaa dyee dah benci gilaa kat aku after kejadian tuh and after aku ckp cmtuh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  :(  :(  after kejadian tuh, he never contact me again . never !!!!!!!!!!!  then , lepas dyee pandang dyee cmtuh, aku TERUS masuk class aku ! Aku tak nak jumpee dyee lagy dah . tak nak ! tak nak  ! haty aku saket gilaa time tuh . sumpaa saket gilaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  semasaa, aku masuk class, harlow perasan mukaa aku time tuh, dan , dengan selambanyee harlow gelakkan aku, and tertawaa kan aku ! mcm fuck off and shitt doe . MAYBEE MEMANGG PATUT AKU DIPERLAKUKAN SEBEGITU AND MAYBEE NASEB AKU MEMANG DAH BEGITU AND NASEB AKU MEMANG MALANG DOE ! then, lec pum masuk . then, after lec masuk . mood aku tibaa-tibaa hilang doe . then, lec pum start mengajarnyee . timetuh, sumpaa aku mals nak belajar and tak adaa mood nak study doee, and, rasaa cm nak blek bilik jee doe  -,-   CONTINUED ~

Friday 8 April 2011

Regretted Plus Stress with My College Life :/

Hey peeps . you must wonder right where i go for all this while right ? and not post something at my blog ? lately, i busyy with my college life and my study . and also, find some calmness for myself . im tryin to forget him although its hard and its already almost one month i`ve tried to forget him . but untill right now, i still cant and never 4get him. why ? why ? why i need to remember about him anymore ? he never ever came back to me . never ! im stress fuckin shit to live this life and sometimes i feel lazy and dont want to further my studies anymore or quit from my college to study . i dont have any spirit to study . seriously ! almost the time i think about him . and sometimes i forced myself to do my assignments . hurmmmmmmmmmm :'(  :'(  when i think again and again, i feel regretted what i did to him and miss him badly damn .  i heard from my friends that He getting worst and look mess up this lately ?  idk why . and many of my friends say he became such like that, adalah keranaa aku . betul kaa ?  is it my fault peeps ?  * my little heart say * if i make him such like that, im really sorry because make you like this . im really sorry if i messed up ur life capital ab . and i want u to know, not only u suffer and and messed up, but include me . im also suffered . after you left me, my life really miserable and messed up . and im suffer a lot when you left me :(  really suffer ! and almost every night i cried about u . never in one day i cant cry about u . never !! never !!! only god know what i feel and what i suffered . :'(  :'( 

Saturday 2 April 2011

Capital AB is Such My First Love :(

* FIRST LOVE *


Saigo no kisu wa tabako no flavor ga shita
Nigakute setsunai kaori

Ashita no imagoro ni wa
Anata wa doko ni irundarou
Dare wo omotterundarou

You were always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to love you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Ima wa mada kanashii love you, so in love
Atarashii uta utaeru made

Ta chidomaru jikan ga
Ugoki dasouto shiteru
Wasureta kunai kotobakari

Ashita no imagoro niwa
Watashi wa kitto naiteru
Anatawo omotterundarou
(yeah-yy~~yeah-yy~~yeah~~~)

You will always be inside my heart 
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
Ima wa mada kanashii lovu songu
Atarashii uta utaeru made

You were always gonna be my love
Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
I'll remember to long you taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
Mada kanashii love you,so in love~~yeah-eh~~
Now and forever
You'll be~~~

I Wish He Could Came Back To Me :/

almost every night my tears are fall and cant stop from fallin, 
almost every night i cant 4get him .
and also i cant throw him away from my mind .
i know, many of u would say, no points i need to cry and no need to remember him again .
but i cant . i`ve already tried many ways to 4get him. many ways !!!!!! 
untill now, i like to being alone than to hang out with my friends .
and, untill now i still cried about him .
i know its sounds ridicilous and crazy peeps .

* i really hope that he can came back to me and also  i and him can be like before this, but in reality he wont came back to me anymore and never ever like before . NEVER EVER ! 


~Come Back To Me lyrics~

The rain falls on my windows
And the coldness runs through my soul
When the rain falls, oh when the rain falls
I don't want to be alone

I wish that I could Photoshop on
Our bad memories
Because the flashbacks, oh the flashbacks
Won't leave me alone

If you come back to me
I'll be all that you need
Baby, come back to me
Let me make up for what happened in the past

Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
Boy, you're one in a million
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back

On the bayside of Manhattan
She goes shopping for new clothes
And she buys this
And she buys that
Just leave her alone

I wish that he would listen to her
Side of the story
It isn't that bad
It isn't that bad
And she's wiser for it now

I admit I cheated
Don't know why I did it
But I do regret it
Nothing I can do or say can change the past

Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
Boy, you're one in a million

Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
You're one in a million
One in a million

Everything I ever did
Heaven knows I'm sorry but
I was too young to see
You were always there for me
And my curiosity got the better half of me
Baby take it easy on me

Anything from A to Z
Tell me what you want to be
I open my heart to be
You are more priority
Can't you see you punished me
More than enough already
Baby take it easy on me

Baby take it easy on me

Baby come back to me
Baby come back to me

Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
Boy, you're one in a million

Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
You're one in a million
One in a million

Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
Boy, you're one in a million
One in a million

Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
I'll be everything you need
Come back
Baby come back to me
Come back
Boy, you're one in a million
One in a million




Friday 1 April 2011

Last Week Is a Hell Week :/

Minggu lepas, adalah minggu nerakaa bagi aku doe. minggu lepas aku terpaksaa jady budak baek kejap kat kolej . selamaa satu minggu tuh aku hanyaa boleh pakai baju kurung sahajaa di kolej . grrrrrrrrrrrrr~ aku tak boleh pakai baju t-shirt and jeans kat kolej . haishhhh~ dah lah class panas . pastuh pakai baju kurung . memang tak lah, aku jady cacing kepanasan jee selamaa satu minggu tuh . HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH~ kalu pakai untuk 2 hari or 3 hary kaa, tak pee lah jugak . dahlah class cm tak adaa aircond jee . padahal dah kuatkan aircond dah :)  belajar pum tak senang ! sorry awwww, kali niey aku bnyak complaint pulak and merungut pulak . lec pum tak than dengan panas class tuh, nak ajar pum tak senang jee . HAHAHAHAHAHA ~ 

He Just Dumped Me :(

Beberapaa hari lepas, aku call CAPITAL AB sebanyak 3 kali . but, panggelan itu tidak diangkat . aku call dyee sbb aku rindu gilaa babeng kat dyee .  
Then, besok petang, dyee call aku balek . aku pum terkejut ah . and aku pum angkat ah call dyee . masaa aku dengar suaraa dyee, betapaa hanyaa tuhan sjja lah thu bahawa aku rindu nak dengar suaraa dyee and senyum dyee dan jugaa y paleng penting, dyee still engat kat aku . aku engat dyee dah lupee kat aku . aku pum sukaa ah . then kitaaorg pum berborak cm besee lah( dyee y start perbualan tuh, aku diam jee) . then, tak lamaa itu, dyee ajak aku makan . aku pum kataa okayy lah . sbb time tuh aku free dri manaa-manaa class . then, dyee kataa dyee nak jumpaa aku kat kedai apekk . tpi sblum aku nak jumpee dyee kat kedai apek, capital ab suh aku tggu call dyee. aku pum tnggu lah dyee call aku . sejam kemudian aku tgu dyee, dyee still tak call aku . then, aku pum call dyee lah hendak kepastian, dyee kataa suh tggu lagy. aku pum kataa okayy lah . aku pum tunggu lah dyee smpai dyee call aku . then aku text and call dyee lah jady kaa tak an ? capital ab tak menjawab langsung text aku and call aku . aku pum bengang gilaa ah. then, aku pum send satu mesej last kat dyee . aku ckp cm niey ah an, next timee jee lah jumpaa babe. aku dah nak blek hostel dah . then, dyee tak bals . *haty aku pum mendidih panas jee * kenapa aku selalu tipu dengan dyee and kenapa janji dyee tak selalu tepati ? dyee lebih mementingkan kawn . padaa hal dyee dah janjii gilaa ngan aku time tuh . mcm dah suree dah, last2 tak jady and dyee diam2 jee . cm bodoh sial . then, naluri aku kuat berkataa y aku niey hanyaa dipermainkan oleh dyee. kawan aku pum ckp cmtuh kat aku y aku hanyaa dipermainkan oleh dyee . malam tuh aku sedih gilaa babeng, sampai aer mataa aku jatuh menitis lagy . sumpaa weyh. why my luck always like this ?  and, why mens always dumped me ? i never dumped guys . damn ! never ever doe . apaa salah aku kat lelaki ? shitttttttt ~ fuck off . aku benci lelaki y bernamaa lelaki doe . sumpaa sial ! aku benci gilaa ,  :( :(

He`s Always On My Mind :(

Every night i remember him,
Every night i thinking about him,
Every night i cant stop thinking and remember him even for a second,
And the most worst thing and also the stupid thing i still hoping that he can came back to me although the reality is not like what i want and still cried about him and cant stop cried about him.
that is the saddest thing and the stupidest thing that i`ve ever do. 
and untill now, i cant stop cried .
IDK why ? 


*dear Capital AB, i want you to know untill now i can`t forget you in every minute and in every second.
and this song reminds me to you and make me really-really sad * 


NEYO-ONE IN MILLION :(


Jetsetter
Gogetter
Nothing better.

Call me Mr. been there done that
Top model chick to your every day hood rat
Less than all but more than a few
But I've never met one like you

Been all over the world
Done a little bit of everything
Little bit of everywhere
With a little bit of everyone
All the girls I've been with
Things I've seen it takes much to impress
But sure enough your glow it makes your soul stand out from all the rest, baby.

I could be in love
But I just don't know (don't know, girl)
Baby one thing is for certain
Whatever you do is working
Other girls don't matter
In your presence can't do what you do
There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you 

Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this

You're not a regular girl
You don't give a damn about the loot
Talking about I can't do for you
But you can do for yourself
Even though that ain't so
Baby cause my dough don't know how to end
But that independent thing I'm with it
All we do is win baby

I could be in love
But I just don't know (don't know, girl)
Baby one thing is for certain
Whatever you do is working
Other girls don't matter
In your presence can't do what you do
There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you

Baby you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this
Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this

Diamond girl,
Only one in the world,
Just one of a kind,
She mine.

Ooh all that I can think about is what this thing could be
A future baby
Baby you're one of a kind
That means that you're the only one for me
Only one for me

Baby (girl) you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this
Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had
And I'm certain that
There ain't nothing better
No there ain't nothing better than this